So big

and.. is just till the end of the night, when i am alone at my room, my bed, in front my computer, i star to thinking.. " nonsenses "
i hate have this emotions, and this memories, cuz' it hurts, it hurts a lot, for that's why im not here everyday, is why i go out of my home, is not to be, or make me "the interesting ", i like stay at home, and do... do nothing, 
today i want to see some movies, i want to cook, i want to clean up, i... i want to make love :(
This morning i woke up late, at 4:30 i was thinking in my bed so many things, things about me, about she, about he and you, 
and i went with my mom at 5:00 to eat some tacos, later, she went at church and I came back to my home, and all this time ( a couple of hours) i've been thinking of you 
and as time passes, i think less of you and what you will do, in what you do and what you say, in you and ...


But it is not until at night, when i review the evidence of my existence ( pictures, facebook, people etc etc ) and i get to see what it was you .. it put me sad. 


I think of you, your family and how great it was to be there. Today i see them as unknown and distant, where i have nothing to say and i can not share neither nonsense, .. 


as time passes, i think less of you and what you will do, in what you do and what you say, in you and all you life :(


I think the best thing today is that even though the feeling is notgone, now i can go on living, dying at night sometimes, but living a day and not embitter my neighborhood and my people.

Before, it hurts every minute of the day, now it only hurts a little when I'm thinking about you: (


I CAN'T FLY !!!!!!!! .. but it is just cuz im not a bird
I CAN'T SWIM !!!!!... cuz im not a fish.


i can smile :) , i can make promess, i can sing, i can write, i can use a computer




I MUST BE A NINJA !!! ... another dream :) 
when i am a ninja... beware 






whit some help :)